OK, I had to settle on two titles because I didn’t want to do two separate blog posts, there are two things on my mind and I need to write about both of them here.
I have been trying to shift some weight for 14 weeks now. I woke up one Sunday and decided I needed to get serious and make some changes, joined weight watchers and got on with it. I still haven’t lost a stone. I don’t mean to sound impatient but surely it should have happened by now? I keep trying to think of my ‘Stay Positive’ post, and I really am trying to keep positive but sometimes it’s not enough. Its weigh day today, so the first thing I did this morning was weigh myself, and I’ve lost 2 lbs yay! However, I still haven’t reached my stone loss yet, and it’s now only one pound away. It seems that pound is so difficult to lose. I was in this position 2 weeks ago, and I put 2 lbs on instead of off. It’s frustrating.
I’ve been out and about more recently; running, camping and hiking lots in the last month – but it doesn’t seem to be having the effect on my weight I hoped it would. Mike asked me the other day if I would rather lose lots of weight and be unfit, or get really fit but not lose much weight. It’s a difficult question but I chose the first one – I’m sick of the size of me! I really love the running and this new side to me and to be honest I’m hoping to have both – lose lots of weight and get fit.
OK – had my little rant about weight now, onto the next thing.
London. I miss London a lot.
Last time I was back at home it was to go to a funeral, but I had the chance to drive through London with Mum and it was wonderful. I get this feeling every time I go home.
Mum and Dad don’t live in the City, they live on the outskirts of London and it’s perfect. The village they live in isn’t the same as it was when I was a kid, well, not to me anyway – it’s probably more dangerous than it was back then, but whenever I go back I just want to stay.
Mike and I have spoken about this and we both agree that living in Nottingham is cheaper and easier and it is the place we will start our family, but I do wish sometimes that it wasn’t the case. I had the most amazing time growing up in London, every school trip was to one of the many museums, Hampton court palace, or London Zoo..
I’m not saying that Nottingham is a bad place to grow up, most of my friends here grew up here; it’s just not where I thought my children would one day grow up. I do struggle with this, and often change my mind and decide that living away from a big city is best. I love the fact that we can jump in the car and within 15 minutes we are in complete countryside, or that we can get to Centerparcs in just over half an hour.
I miss my parents too…a lot. I have always been very close with both my parents, when I was little I used to say that I would never leave home and I would stay there and look after them. I don’t see them enough, and due to money, that’s not going to change any time soon.
Christmas is always such a rush, driving down to Mum and Dad’s on Christmas Eve, spending the night, Christmas Day goes like a flash and then we are back on the motorway on Boxing Day morning to go and see Mike’s mum. The spark and run up to Christmas is gone, now it’s just a worry right up until the day itself which turns out to be a blink and you’ll miss it day, and then we go somewhere else.
I do sometimes wonder what would have happened if I hadn’t left home so young. I moved out aged 17, to a new city over 100 miles away from home. I did it for love and I don’t regret it, but I do wonder what might have happened if I hadn’t Would I have stayed working for the bank? Would I have gone back to college? Uni? Would I be smarter? Thinner?
I’m honestly not sure what’s going to happen to me. Maybe I’ll move back to London in a few years, or maybe we’ll settle in Nottingham. Either way, I’ll always be happy as long as I’ve got Mike. And a few more visits ‘daaahn saaaf’ wouldn’t go a miss.